Afternoon y'all........so lemme continue from where i
stopped
As the years went by, he could give me less and less of what
I needed. Things became strained between us. I was a terrible nag, and I see
that now. But the problem was that there were just too many things about him
that I wanted to change. And as I began to realize that I could never change
him and shouldn’t have to, I struggled SO much with what the right thing to do
was. It ate away at me day and night, because I honestly couldn’t imagine my
life without him. And being alone TERRIFIED me.
Somewhere during all this, I read the book The Secret which
is all about the law of attraction. I really, really believed in what it said.
It inspired me. I realized that I had not arranged my life in a way that
allowed for all the things I so desired. I hate to skim over this because it’s
so important, but let’s just say that I KNEW I had to decide what I wanted my
future to look like and start taking active steps towards attracting that
future. And staying in my current relationship at the time was a major
roadblock. I knew in my heart that if I stayed where I was, life would always
be a struggle.
So one day the breakup finally happened. We talked and cried
for hours and finally decided that we could never truly work. He decided to
move out and let me stay in the house and keep the dogs because, on his income
alone, he couldn’t afford to live there (I made enough waiting tables to cover
the bills if pennies were tightly pinched).
I can honestly say that the 48 hours after that break up
were the toughest of all my life. I ugly-cried those kind of tears that come
from somewhere inside you didn’t even know existed—a place of fear and sudden
awareness that you are completely alone.
And that’s the place I was in when I met Matthew. We met a
mere 48 hours after the ex and I called it quits, which could either be
considered really terrible timing or really great timing. I choose to believe
the timing was perfect.
But let's back up again for just a minute.
Remember how I was working at that little restaurant? Well,
for a couple of years I’d been waiting on my future in-laws without even
knowing it. We’ll just call them Mr. and Mrs. D for our purposes here today.
They were an odd couple. Mrs. D was a beautiful blonde and
friendly as can be, and Mr. D was quiet, reserved, and hard to read. I really
enjoyed waiting on them, though, and I found it amusing when Mrs. D would
occasionally mention their son in California and how perfect he and I would be
for each other. She mentioned this to me on at least two or three occasions,
but I always laughed and just politely reminded her that I had a boyfriend. I
came to find out later that, in actuality, Mrs. D talked a whole lot more about
Matthew and I one day meeting than I ever knew at the time; Mr. D now says he
had to hear about it every single time they came to the restaurant, and
Matthew, when he was in town, would always go to eat there and would hear about
me then, too. But for some reason, I was never working when Matthew happened to
stop in with his parents, and our paths never crossed.
M guessing this story is getting too long or what do u guys
think???.........
Bt if u like it dat way i dnt mind..... :D
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